♥ shan's.

Monday, October 31, 2005

grt weather.
its nice to be out playin in such weather.
but im STUCK.
at home.
hw bored.

hw nice if sch's still on.
at least thr's some fun in the cls.
talk abt the chalet.
it seems to be like a failure.
cash stripped.
wht abt the food.?
i wonder.

i felt like slpin agains.
totally BORED.
why arent thr nice tv progs to watch.?
hols and thr arent any nice movie either.

im gng TANNIN.
BOOS-

bring me out to play bball whn ur o's are over.
will u.?
im BORED.

blogged at 5:14 PM

Sunday, October 30, 2005

BORED.

im really gna ROT sooner or later.
i TRIED readin CHEM last night whn i came back frm popo's hse.
ASS.
it felt so SLPY.
wht a grt attitude i have hurs.
i jus felt like SLPIN till i feel tht im no loger BORED.
everyone's bored.

SPORE's very SMALL.
whr else can we go.?
shall we go SENTOSA.?
why is STEPF wrkin.?
oh babe.
i need her to go TANNIN w/ me.!

i think i shall start buyin ASSESSMENTS.
so tht i would mug hard and not feel bored.
TV PROGs are all so SIAN-ED.

SOMEONE.
PLS BRING ME OUT.
BE IT MAKIN ME STUDYIN OR WHT.
JUS BRING ME OUTSIE.

swt dovey-
drunk in those swt surrenders.
nothin but memories.

blogged at 3:19 PM

Saturday, October 29, 2005

report books are back.
i did my best anw.
but thr's still room for improvement.
gna mug hard for A maths.
since ms tan is gna make us re-do tht EOY paper till we pass.
im gna appreciate her effort.!

lets say im gna be good for this hols.?
im gna go back for trng.
wow-aint tht amazing.?
CHARMAINE LOVES WHT I JUS WROTE.
im gna mugged hard durin the hols.

i cried whn i saw granny's photo.
everythin happened too fast.
before i knew it.
granny's gone.
memorable photo i had.
the one and only one.
im gna make it into a BIGGER piece.
and had it place in a photo frame.
GRANNY WILL BE LOVED FOREVER.

you raised me up
this song shall be dedicated to granny.
she was the one who raised me up in many ways.
words cant replace hw much love she gave me.
she's anothr mother to me.
GRANNY.
I LOVE YOU.

blogged at 2:11 PM

Thursday, October 27, 2005

hadn't felt tht pain for so long.
but today.
i felt tht twitch.
I MISS GRANNY.
darn tht grand-parents day.
i thought i would have seen things better.
but i didn't.
FACT is always FACT.

to me.
granny still am here.
its jus tht i hadn't been visitin her.
but whn kathy fernadez told us to give the postcards to our grandparents.
i realise i was simply LYIN to myself.
GRANNY's GONE.

ahhhhhhhhhhh.
ass.

i felt unwanted agains.
the love aint thr.
every single thing i did.
it was ALWAYS wrong.
never was i RIGHT.
say YOU LOVE ME.
im nt tht UNWANTED CHILD OF URS.
mummy, will u say tht.?

the feelin of nt ur child but ur MAID.
tell me im wrong.

blogged at 7:23 PM

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

blahs.
HUSHAN says ; CIA've gt a grt guy.

envied.
whr's MINE.?
im a greedy girl.
i wanted the time to turn back to so many time.
GREEDY SLOWPOKE.

so many wrds yet unspoken.
its tough.
i thought of writin them down.
whn i die.
mayb someone will pass tht to u.?
nt sure.
things will probably FADE away.
and u wont rmb any promise u made.
am i right to say tht.?
all those wrds u said.
is nothin but only WRDS.
they dont meant anythin to u.
but ever consider bout wht they meant to me.?
i doubt so.
whrs the days whr we talked everythin under the sun.?
whrs the days u TEASE me.?
i dont wna things this way.
its so STIFF and COLD.

wait till the day i DIE ;

blogged at 10:19 PM

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

L1R5 - 31.

tell me whr am i gna go.

im feelin the BLUES.
im TIRED.

whr's LIL SIS.

i MISS :
. the days me and CIA had
. the days me and JO had
. the days me and NAT had
. the days me and LYNN had
. the days me and GIRLFRNDS had
. the days me and XAVIER BRO had
. the days whr tht BUNCH hangs arnd - MARK. FUSHENG. JERAMY

i miss so many things.
will the time turn back.
wht i miss most is u.
ahhhh.
dumb.

blogged at 9:29 PM

Monday, October 24, 2005

wht a tirin day.
nice day out w/ my PRTY LIL SIS.
guess wht.
we didn't take PICS.
nvm.
whn we're alone.
we SHALL.
bought stuffs.
my bag.!
hahs.
nw we know someone's so guilliable. -whtever way u spell it.

met up w/ don. weiling and mich.
wnt MOVIE.
flight plan.
some parts gave me a fright.
the surround sound system.
thts why.
popcorn left unfinished.
THREE peepos sharing it.
and we've gt mre than half of it LEFT.
wht a waste.
but i think i was the only one muching throughout the movie.
weiling and mich was WATCHIN.

wnt TAKA's PUMA.
my SHOES are so gone.!
darn.
shall find anothr day and go get my shoes w/ my bro.
but whts the pt of havin it whn my ankle's spoilt.
its so so so spoilt lahs.
im no longer able to be in competitive sports and i meant it lahs.
whnever i walk long nwadays.
my ankle jus wna give way.
my ankle hurts.
dumb.
and while talkin to bro.
i came to realise why peepos become COACH.
thts b'cause some parts of their body are so SPOILT.
its jus like ME.!
oh well.
then i shall go learn the real NETBALL and be a COACH someday.
cant believe im nt gna really be able to do sports.
my SO SO SO SPOILT ANKLE.

still stuck w/ my flu.
appetite's gettin better.
i GUESS.
ahhh.
im havin nose block nw.
hw good.
dumbsie.

i wish tht u were here w/ me.
make me fel warmth whn i felt cold.
nagged at me to take my medicine.
im livin in ystd's swtness.
hw great. (:

blogged at 10:31 PM

Sunday, October 23, 2005

grumps-
i think im dying soon.
and esthr wna die w/ me whn the wrld ends.
swt lovey LIL SIS i have.
ahhhh.
her BIG NAME in my BLOG agains.
nvm.
I LOVE HER TONNS.

back frm outside nt long.
grt.
i finished the corrections.
outsie w/ esthr tml.
i promised to bring her out.
( :
but here i am.
having this sickenin flu.
i guess im dyin real soon.

no appetite at all.
i guess esthr's gotta eat alone tml.
darns-
FOOD FOOD FOOD.
so delicious in front of me.
satays. chicken chops.
doldrums-
im sry.
i cant seen to put those food in my mouth.
feelin horrible.

i thnk u for tht care u gave me jus nw.
SNUGGLES INTO MY BED ;

blogged at 8:57 PM

Saturday, October 22, 2005

i slpt for 15 hrs.
frm 4pm to 6 am.
hw incredible am i.
had MAC for breakfast.
IM LOVIN' IT.

managed to STAY AWAKE.
and clean my room.
look hw clean my room am.!

kids are at my place nw.
dums.
im BORED.
really am.!

gna bring them dwn to pt soon.
SOON.

blogged at 7:46 PM

Friday, October 21, 2005

ROARS.
pissed pissed pissed.
BRO spoilt my stuffs.!
HELLO.?!
tht was my PRESENT frm my PRI sch teacher.~!
i merely showed u and u spoilt it lahs.!
ASS ;

grumps.
everyone's coming over tml.!
darn.
i wna QUIET moment.
i really wna it.
i jus wna lock myself up in some place lahs.
ESTHR ; BRING ME OUT WILL U.?

wrk wrk wrk.
ms chia says we're nt paying enough effort w/ OUR wrk.
i wonder if i really gave it my best.
i dont know.
sighs-

my hols are stuck w/ HMWRK.
A MATHS and E MATHS paper 2.
and i brought CLAR's A MATHS paper hm lahs.!
hw dumb can i be.?

IM PISSED.
and i wna have QUIET moments.
the CONSTRUCTION downstairs is CRAZY.
i waited for the lift for 25 mins ystd.
and i still didn't get the LIFT after tht.
instead i WALKED up the STAIRS.
10 floors KILLS.
im OLD.

SHUD UP.!!!!!!!!!!!

------------------------------------------------------
i lost my soul in the rain.
bring me back to whr i belong.
my soul.
got lost in tht rain.
im stuck.

blogged at 4:08 PM

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

wow.
diligence is like fourth in the rankin for MATHS.
can u believe tht.?
but of course.
INT is better than us.
our MATHS are like so lousy alrdy lahs.
tirin day.
and i gt darn ITCHY today.
drowsiness.
blahs.
i need a SLP.
SOON.
perhaps NW.?

i miss playin ball.
shall we.?

blogged at 9:22 PM

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

wht a irony day.
the sch time was SHIT.
but whn sch ends.
its GRT.

papers are back.
WELL DONE.
i failed something which i shouldnt be failing.
tried hard.
but it wnt the other way.
DISAPPOINTIN ;

they're gna suggest a ADMISSION EXAM.
at the strt of nxt yr.!
those tht pass it will cont to have A MATHS.
those tht FAIL.
will have to say gd byes to A MATHS forever.
i bet pauline wong is gna AGREE w/ it lahs.!
oh grt.
then the SEC 3s is gna be jus like those peepos sitting for their O's this yr.
STUDY STUDY and STUDY.
nvm.
its for OUR O's anw.!

im gna start studyin nw.
shd i.?
or shd i not.?
sounds so kiasu rights.?
but why wait till its nxt yr whn i still have doubts regardin this yr's stuff.?
alrights.
thts it.
im gna start studyin.!
call me whtever names u wan.
i DONT care.!

. CHEM
. PHY
. PURE GEOG
. SOCIAL STUDIES
. HISTORY ELECTIVE
. A MATHS
. E MATHS
. ENGLISH
. CHINESE

im strtin my REVISIONS.

--------------------------------

met lil sis.
and we wnt pizza.
yums (:
talk everythin under the sky.
we am ALIKE.
we YEARN for the same thing.
we had this LIL secret among US.
(:
its the FIRST time we ever talk so much FACE to FACE.
cool.
mre of tht.!!

ESTHR ;
im gna start my revisions.
but i'll still BRING U OUT.
i promise u tht.
and i'll.!
im gna do my BEST for my A MATHS.
i'll PASS.
i wna TAKE A MATHS.
u'll be supporting me rights.?
silly girl.
i wont let my thoughts go too WILD.
i wna u to be ON PILE w/ them.

U BRIGHT MY DAY A LOT TODAY.
and i mean A LOT.

blogged at 8:34 PM

Monday, October 17, 2005

alrights.
we had been talkin abt tht since ystd.
abt tht article me n MICH read.
we're jus gna live till tht day to see it.
guess we're.

wnt weiling hse for movie.
erms.
COMEDY.
LAUGHTERS.
CARDS.
tiredness.

gna get back our results tml.
as in PAPERS.
darn.
alrights.
im jus gna FACE THE TRUTH BRAVELY then.

PUS.
eeeeewwww.
minor yet DISGUSTIN.
hahs.

im kinda in a HOLIDAY mood alrdy.
nahs.
i need to do so many things.
but time is limited.

I NEED TO :
- bring esthr OUT
- buy my BAG
- buy my TRACK SHOES
- REPACK my RM
- brush up CHEM.
- go SWIMMIN.
- go TANNIN.
- go KBOX w/ SHERYL.
- meet-ups w/ XAVIER.
- take my BOOKS.

so many stuffs.
yet so lil time.

STOP SCRMIN.
jus let it be a QUIET MOMENT.
BILLS BILLS BILLS.
i know its my FAULT.
but do u have to SCRM SO LOUD.
i WONDER if im ur CHILD ALWAYS.
and i MEANT ALWAYS.
u scrm at me whnever u're havin PMS.
im always the ONE at FAULT.
then wht abt KORKOR.?
aint he also AT FAULT TOO.?
SHUD UP.

whn i ran away frm hm.
u CRIED and BEG me hm.
whn im HM.
u SCOLD ME LIKE HELL.
DO U EVER TREASURE ME.?
SO WHT AM I.?
A VENTIN BAG.?

THIS IS MY MESSY LIFE.
SOMETIMES I WISHED IM BETTER OFF DEAD

blogged at 8:57 PM

Sunday, October 16, 2005

woke up by CEWEI today.
thought who called me early in the morn.
but anw.
was LATE in meetin weiling.
MAC for breakfast.
call me slow or wht.
i jus knew tht thr was.
BREAKFAST STUDENT MEAL.!
hahs.
it started pourin right whn me n weiling were in the bus.
wet wet wet.
hahs.
fivesome then took the bus and met debbie.
whinning ;
hahs.

reach rivervale pri.
had FUN.
ALVIN ANG.
see his big name.
hahs.
tryin to play matchmaker hurs.?
made tht wilson and me so paisehs.
dots.
thank goodness i had some rescue.!
but his hands were shivering.
and YET.
he says ITS MINE.
so its whose.?!
hahs.

played.
sang.
LAUGHED.
we ended up so tired.
left on our own.
slipped and cut my knee w/ the drainage cap.
dumb-sie.
but its OKAYS.
(:

bought WINNIE THE POOH PLASTER.
cause i couldn't stand weiling's PRINCESS plaster.
called off the outing w/ cousin.
gt lazy.
gna watch MOVIE at weiling's place.

yawn.
its gettin LATE.
im sleepy.
nice weather.

gentle whisper.
tellin u a swt night.
will u be able to hear me.?
good night boy ;

blogged at 10:41 PM

Saturday, October 15, 2005

saw an article on the papers today.
s'pore will be hit w/ tsunami one day.
and we're all gna die.
epicentre is shifting north.
and thts whr s'pore is.
we're NOT SAFE.
the end of the wrld is comin.
and its gettin nearer and nearer.
look at the disaster tht has happened.
tsunami.
hurricane.
typhoon.
earthquake.
volcanice eruption.

so many thoughts.
so many wrds.
and yet i cant say a thing.
bro doesn't knows.
only ESTHR knew.
swt lil sis.
we think too ALIKE.
so ALIKE.
tht we thought the same thing at the same time.
can u believe tht.?

CHUANLIAN ;
im sry.
its not tht i didn't wna go.
but scond thought.
wht will bro and sis think abt wht we're gna do.
they'll get angry for sure.
touched but angry at the same time.
bro's gna think im wastin money.
im sry.

wrds left not spoken.
meanins lie in tht letter.
but did u get it.?
NOTHIN.
i jus wna tell u hw much u meant.
if the wrld's ending.

blogged at 11:57 PM

Friday, October 14, 2005

alrights-
the STRESS times are over.!
time to PARTY.

papers are all gone case yeahs.
i did my best and shall no regret.
(:

momsie doesn't wna go shoppin on tml.
my bag.!
down the drain.
blahs.
off to AMK tml.
laksa.?!

out w/ cousin on mon.
most probably w/ her guy.
dumbsie.
im gna stone.!
dum dum dum.

i start to think too much agains.
i wna avoid u.
i saw u calling me this mornin.
but i jus kept walkin.
i pretended not to see u.
im feelin uncomfortable.
its no longer like the past.
im feelin strange being w/ u.
i told ah pao.
whn u graduates.
i wont be contacting u.
i dont feel comfortable anymre.
not even whn u asked if u could borrow my books.
i gave reasons.
im sry.
pretendence is all i could say.
im sry.
i've changed.
no longer tht sheep u know.

im gna miss so many pple.!
its the sec 4s and 5s last day.
no mre SEXY to disturb me.
no mre bro to talk to me.
too many-

im jus a NOBODY.
nothing-

has mervyn's promos exams finish.?

blogged at 6:24 PM

Sunday, October 09, 2005

yars yars yars.
im feelin sleepy.

main papers are comin.
cool.
imagine me managin them.
dumbsy.

wnt studyin w/ shepherd.
he didn't know any chem.!
so im stuck.
i TAUGHT him MATHS.
can u imagine this.?

took 159 to AMK.
then MRT to ADMIRALTY.
long journey.
i was DUMB.
dom was in thr SAME cabin as me.
and yet i didn't see him.
ONLY SAW HIM WHN WE WERE ALIGHTIN.
dumbsy me.!
it was really so FUNNY.

celebrated tht lil god sis' bdae.
she's 3.
was thinkin.
whn she's 12.
im gna be 24.
so old lahs.
pretty girl.
photos uploaded.

nxt sat.
gatherin at AMK.
laksa.!
yums.!
im caught bro's flu.
and im gna get real sick soon.
blahs.

will we stay in contact whn u leave.?
will u still talk to me the way u always do.?
will we still meet ups.?
will we.?
im thinkin agains.

MUGGED HARD.
jus give evrythin the best.
nothin's worth regrettin.
believe tht u can make it.
TRUST those WRDS.

*ah pao.
i still believe in FATE.
esthr knows wht im talkin abt.
hahs.
( :

blogged at 12:03 AM

Friday, October 07, 2005

alrights.
gna type fast before my laptop die.

i admit.
the chinese papers today was difficult.
never in my life have i take one and half hr to do it.
ms chew was worried tht i wouldn't be able to finish.
she was thinkin.
"aiyo, why so slow.? 10 mins left.!"
alrights.
i scribbled my way through.
damn.
i ask too much frm myself.
forcin myself to a limit where i cant take it anymre.

thr's a weird feelin gng on in me.
it makes me so sick.
im feelin not well at all.

VIRUS are in the cls and at home.
im bound to get FLU soon.

pizza for lunch today.
SMALL talks w/ lynn-sie. chuanlian and mich.
lynn-sie and i rmb hw alan lecture her.
tht fat ass.
yes he's fat.
but i dont know hw fat.
cause i've never hug him before.
my 3 days relation w/ him was so well-heard.
it seems evryone knew abt it.

im probably too full.

no one was thr.
dums.

blogged at 8:58 PM

Thursday, October 06, 2005

EL paper 1 was totally screwed.
i dont even know wht i was writin as compared to MYE.

no MATHS lesson.
its on tml.
helpin nigel bud w/ his skin.
i hope its gettin DONE soon.
yups.

my source of MOTIVATION.
tht piece of "paper" bro wrote to me.
it jus wrote.

HELLO, XAVIER here.!!
smiley face and BYE BYE.

tht was my motivation.!
but somehw i lost the sense of motivation.
i dont wna slack.
cause i shouldn't be disappointin anyone.
bro.
make me STUDY hard.
PLS.?

blogged at 9:35 PM

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

i thought too much over ur qns.

tell me im thinkin too much.
tell me its never tht way.
tell me.

blogged at 9:33 PM

i LOST my voice.
this mornin it was darn SEXY.
and jus nw i completely lost it.
but i found it back nw.
hahs.

ACCOMPLISHMENT.
taught mich lim A maths.
MATRICES.
hahs.
our FISHBALL makins.!

im gettin so OLD-SSIE.

walked off w/o sayin bye.
im SRY.
i really didn't mean it.
i was tired.
yes i am.
all i wanted was jus to get home and slp.
tht dumb ankle's wearin me down.
felt cold.
dum-BOS.

chuanlian had fun w/ my quietness.
she says i couldn't retaliate.
hahs.
quite true though.

FORGIVE and FORGET.
arent these days nice and good.?

gna get back durin hols.
first TWO weeks.
dumb.
ms tan took all the mornin first slot.!
cant imangine hw it'll be listenin to mrs goh durin the hols.
hahs.

i wna have slpover w/ ESTHR.!
i wna talk to her.!
i wna tell her so much stuffs.
and i cant wait till she tells me mre.
la la la la.
small talks. SWT smile.!
(:

blogged at 8:08 PM

Sunday, October 02, 2005

its mummy and daddy's 23rd anniversary.!
asked mummy whn she started dating daddy.
at the age of 16.
hahs.
i know her lil secret.!
wnt out for dinner in a restaurant @ AMK.
the yam paste was YUMMY.!
laughed and cracked jokes w/ my bro.
his 20 but yet behave like a fifteen.!
and he's UNDER-BLOGGIN.

was talkin on msn w/ lil sis ystd night.
it was a real NICE one.
she told me stuffs which i never know.
hahs.
she's a silly girl.
but well, we do THINK ALIKE.

exams are drawin near.
choose to picked chapt and study.
im takin risk.
:))

gna study hist before gettin off to slp.
i suspect im havin rashes.
im gettin darn itchy.!

blogged at 11:14 PM

Saturday, October 01, 2005

they were total strangers.
but yet.
someone pulled them together.
and they finally knew each other.
bitter swt moments followed.
the girl was childish.
but yet.
he made her mature.
he made her think positively whn things wnt wrong.
he made her more independent.
being always thr for her.
the girl became reliant on him.

time made the girl think a lot.
it made her think abt her foolish she was.
things aren't gna work out and it never will.
but whnever words of such came out.
the guy's wrds and action make her think agains.
perhaps its all a misunderstandin.

the girl tried to forget everythin.
but she couldn't do it.
time and time again.
she tried so much.
tht it worn her down.

mood swings and all.
finally the girl decided.
tht guy's gna jus be a big bro of hers.

she yearn for tht shoulder whnever she's tired on the bus.
she yearn for tht hand tht pulls her through whnever she's in tough time.
she yearn for tht listenin ear whnever she needs someone.

LOVIN someone doesn't meant tht u have to be with him/her.
as long as he/she is happy.
thts all it matters.

blogged at 10:38 PM

quiet moments.
left alone.
no one knows except xunfu.
but i shut off my phone.
nahs.
i wasn't angry.
i didn't know wht i want either.
don. shepherd.
tried callin me.
but i jus didnt on my phne.
thought so much.
stuffs stuffs stuffs.
im gna be better.
ton through last night.
woke up early.
not much wrds.
but its all the thoughts.
its all the thoughts.

IM ALONE ;

blogged at 6:38 PM