Tuesday, January 31, 2006
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MS ONG CHUAN LIAN (:three days of hols.
gone just within a wink.
first day.
slacked the whole day at granny's place.
bored out.
second day.
went momsie's side.
fun.
didn't go over to god grandmom's place.
i feel better with my cousins.
(:
went to great grandmomsie's place.
it felt colder than last year.
lesser people this year.
earned myself a movie ticket money.
but didn't manage to catch it.
girlfriend was like broke.
third day.
went auntie's place for lunch.
then to chengen's place for celebration.
KFC for dinner.
murderer for activity.
pretty fun.
i've got praise for my WINKS (:
hahs.
school's starting tml.
dreaful.
3 periods of self study.
wow.
thats all FOLKS.
HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY CHENGEN.!
blogged at
9:46 PM
Friday, January 27, 2006
one week has just pass.
tada.
the new year everyone's looking forward to is coming.
i seriously dont look forward to.
hahs.
PMS.?
NO.
im still living in the past.
the past where granny is here.
i know im STUPID to keep like thinking about the past.
who doesn't.?!
the thought of granny am no longer here makes me wna well up at home on everyday.
no visitings.
BUT oh well.
life still goes on.
and as usual i've no choice.
i dont care about the money i have this year.
however, im bothered by the fact this is different from LAST YEAR.
grumps.
can i really well up at home momsie.?
this week was kinda tiring.
maybe its VERY tiring.
i drop A MATHS.
im not cut-out to study.
E maths will do.
so im paying 200% during ms kok's lesson.
but i always YAWN during her class.
hahas.
-----------------
that past.i no longer wna think about it.its forever so tiring.i felt i couldn't talk to u anymore.u were so different now.is it b'cause of ur work.?i wonder.i felt that i couldn't trust in u as much as i do.i cant explain why too.but its over lets just say.i dont wna have to always shed tears.im tired.songs make me ponder bout that past.the caring days.i shed tears.but im gonna be strong from now on.i bid goodbye to that past.
blogged at
10:12 PM
Saturday, January 21, 2006
ystd wasn't nice.
never was it.
fears. troubles. pressure.
everything'sjust going in circle.
momsie's nagging.
studies' worries.
teachers' pressure.
i cired hard last night.
and i even thought of silly stuffs.
its stupid.
but just put yourself in my shoes.
be me for a day.
and u'll understand whatever shit im going through.
u'll wna quit after FIVE hours.
my mom is darn particular about the household cleanliness.
and so she often screams at me.
like the hair i drop when i comb in the toilet.
the hair i drop in my room.
the way my bed sheet is.
and and.
I"VE TO CLEAN THE TOILET AFTER I FINISH BATHING.
i know it sounds ridiculous.
but yes.
I HAVE TO CLEAN THE BATH AREA AFTER I BATHE.
momsie's afraid that the wall will have those black black stuffs.
not the wall.
but the cement slub in between every tiles.
yars.
so i HAVE to clean the toilet after i bathe.
and if i dont.
i'll get nag and scream at.
but its never your average screamin or naggin.
my momsie's naggin will make u drop tear instantly.
my cousins dont like momsie.
i failed EL for the first time.
its JOURNAL somemore.!
okays.
mdm woo's making me very worried about EL.
its the FIRST TIME i worry about my EL.
let me quote an example.
we were going through the corrections for the diagnostic test.
the mdm woo went very fast.
her speed was somehow like Japan's bullet train.
and out of a sudden she ask if she's too fast.
of course.
always a slow one.
i shouted "YES".
but she continue while leaving me hanging there.
not understanding a single word she said.
lessons in sch are very rush.
yes.
i felt like im hanging out of no where.
the pressure is making me drain.
chem is gettin worst.
tan bee tin rushes through the chapts.
but i still dont understand last year's stuff.
where's mrs jessie chew.?
time's running out.
everyone's telling me to relax.
but i'm not even confident enough.
im hanging and about to drop into the extremely danger zone.
i need assurance.
-------------------
i dont feel confident of myself.i lose faith in myself.the perseverance spirit i had in my pri sch days were gone.im just a changed person now.i need assurance.i need guidance.i need help.i dont ask u out for nothin.i needed help.u were among those i really can trust on.being hurt too many times makes me lose trust in peepos easily.im still very afraid.
blogged at
11:41 PM
Friday, January 20, 2006
who says friday am a HAPPY DAY.
it wasn't from the start.
the stupid virus is still in me.
i thought it was okays alrdy.!
mrs nathan says she will have to force A LOT of people in my class to drop.
im probably one of them.
i only attempted 5 or 6 qns.?
this is so shitty lahs.
next is the TP outing tml.
everyone's backing off.
reasons are given.
FINE.
to be happy is very easy.
YES.
but will i really be happy.?
i felt so irritated out of a sudden.
no not.
its not out of a sudden.
it was since the START OF SCH TODAY.
just BID GOOD BYE lahs.!
f*
blogged at
10:24 PM
Saturday, January 14, 2006
make myself free from the temptaions of the comp.
a week without any usage of comp.
it feels good.
workload's heavier.
since we're sec fours already.
tuition's helping.
teacher says im slow but i can make it.
(:
i get very distracted easily during ms kok's lesson.
my attention wasn't capture by her.
sigh-
and so i learn nothing about cumulative frequency.
yups.
mrs nathan loves to use the textbook.
so no excuse of not bringng textbooks anymore.
COMPLAIN.!had
CHEM pratical ystd.
was coughing badly.
wanted to go toilet when chuanlian went.
asked MS TAN BEE TIN for permission.
and she REJECTED.!
CANT SHE SEE I NEED WATER.?!
cough cough cough all the way through during chem.
was reluctant to do the practical too.!
ATTITUDES.
the coughs.
the flus.
im filled w/ viruses.
HAHAHS.
kept coughin in class.
and i think im like the noisy one in class this few days.?
used up one packet of weishan's tissue in three hours.
------------------------
i was made a more independent person w/o u.things changed.and i dont have the urge to depend on u.afterall it seems like a good thing.(:THANK YOU : KRISS. CHUANLIAN. KWAIHOONG.im so touched by the prayers u guys said for me.i'll get well soon.for god will hear u guys' prayers.(:
blogged at
12:27 AM
Friday, January 06, 2006
first week of sch's down.
O's coming in 4 months time.
i meant CHINESE.
that A1 is MINE.!
i swear im gonna make it MINE.
not much lessons this week.
first two days spend intereacting.
but i doubt so the interaction works.
mr menjit went back his words.
now he allowed the girls to sit with the girls.
HOW UNFAIR IS THAT TO THE REST.!
complains complains-
mdm woo still seems so funny.
this ms tan that teachers me chem.
seems like MS KOK no 2.!
mr menjit's naggy just as worst as mr tan.
mdm ee's very loud.
sec fours already.
but yet it seems like only the girls bothered.
guys guys guys.
yakking all the while during lesson time.
thats very typical for my class.
which guy in my class dont yak away when the teacher talks.?
oh.
i rmb two who dont.
HAHAHS.
got damn depressed after sch.
its all over.
no more trainings since we wont be able to participate in the tournament.
my ankle still hurts.
im NOT going to see a doc.
its just an OLD PROB.
--------------------
stop lying to yourself when u know the ans.i need some console.it just felt damn disheartening.SCREAMS SCREAMS.
blogged at
11:00 PM
Thursday, January 05, 2006
i said i wasn't gonna come online.
but i came.
never mind.
at least i get to talk w/ my dearie.
i so so so miss her.!
lessons started.
FOO CE WEI loves his GAY partner.
so i ended up sitting w/ BIG COW.
never mind.
i listened for lessons.
okays.
ITS THE FIRST TIME I LISTEN AND UNDERSTOOD EVERYTHIN.
I MISS THE PRETTY STARFISH.off to study already-
blogged at
10:31 PM
Tuesday, January 03, 2006
everyone's talking bout their first day of school.
so im here to talk about it too.
tiring it seems.
class is located on the highest storey.
AND.
i dont know where the FEMALE toilet is.!
stupid okays.
TAN HAI SENG became our form.
we kinda miss MISS CHEW already.!and this new teacher became our co-form.
he's called. MR MENJI or something like that.
IRRITATIN TAN HAI SENG refuse to let us have our time table.
grumps.
and oh yeahs.
MR FUH YANG JUN is our class CHAIRMAN.
MS ONG CHUAN LIAN our class VICE CHAIRPERSON.
i got sabo-ed during the first round.
all YANG JUN'S fault.
shouted my NAME out of NO WHERE.!
got a little to HIGH in the early mornin.
ENERGY level was about to die right after recess.
TEACHERS made us do BORING stuffs.
CLAR started to zi bi.
i had nothing better to do either.
the mood was so funny out of a sudden.
it felt as though everyone's suffering from PMS.
including ME.
i wasn't happy.
there was just some reasons.
I MADE ROCKER KRISS HAPPY AND TOUCHED TODAY.
(:
so proud of myself.
i forget to give her a hug.!
nvm.
but i gave her sweets.
i didn't know why.
but i had the urge to buy her sweets and make her smile.
i LOVE MAKING PEOPLE SMILE.
this aint the year to slack anymore.
the pressure is already in me.
i just kept worrying.
its always like this.
TML"S GNA BE BORED TOO.
H.I has got FIVE DMs.
. thriple L
. mr sing
. jamil
. ong cc
. mr awar
(whatever way his name is spelt)CHIONG AND SOON I"LL BE OUT OF THAT SCH.!
blogged at
9:29 PM
Monday, January 02, 2006
i couldn't get to sleep.
and the clock's turnin to twelve soon.
its getting late.
and there's sch tml.
i dont know why.
i felt dishearted to go sch.
---------------
maybe all i wna hear is ur good night words.was ystd a dream.?i had the urge to msg.
blogged at
11:39 PM
2006.
had a bad start.
im gonna change it.
to a beautiful one.
when the clock strucks twelve.
5 mins later.
i was soaked in tears.
msg not replied.
i felt like shutting down.
lie was said.
why.?
i dont understand it.
am i someone whom is always that guilable to u.?
the one whom i trusted the most lied to me.
and yet.
i smiled and said its none of my business.
wht is this world becoming.?
i should have get out on my own just now.!
was ystd a mask u put up when u talked to me.?
I DONT KNOW HOW TO TALK TO U ANYMORE.
blogged at
2:21 PM
